Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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