He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
