Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
