i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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