I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just want nice things and good sex
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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