i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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