Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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