i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
