you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
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