i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
