It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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