Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Randomize
