It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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