erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
