hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
My vagina is officially offended.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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