Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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