You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
