im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize