i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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