The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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