I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
