you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
This house was built for laser tag.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
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