We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
