so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
