The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I have post one night stand depression
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
