so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Who did Billy Mays play for?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
