what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
