i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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