If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
