I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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