O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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