Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
