like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
