no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
