I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
