Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
