Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize
