His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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