But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Randomize
