idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
