i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
