; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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