You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Randomize
