So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
