i permit you to call me
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
