You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
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