That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
