just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
