people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
