I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
