I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
